Stay Home PaPa

Mass Transit Mayhem Triggers Maddie Meltdown

Posted on September 3, 2011 Updated on December 5, 2011

Maddie the city girl made it clear that she needed to put in some time on the waterfront this afternoon. So Maddie, mom and poppa jumped a Jersey Light Rail train and headed for the action.

At 5-weeks-old, Maddie is a long-time veteran of train travel (her 3rd trip) and handled today’s eight-minute rush hour journey like a real pro. She was not as impressed with the bumpy sidewalk we encountered when we got off the train. After each bump, her little hands jutted out as if to say, “Hey driver, you missed one of the potholes back there!”

We were enjoying a nice breezy evening on the Hudson River when suddenly, Maddie ran into some Diablo-diaper issues. Her mom and I made a beeline for the closest hotel because they have the cleanest bathrooms. The change was successful and a mini-crisis was averted, but Gina and I knew that we were playing with house money and it was time to get the baby back home.

We hopped the homeward bound train and everything was falling our way – that is until we got greedy. The motion of the train lulled Maddie into a deep sleep and we foolishly decided to push our luck.

Why not extend the good times and troll around Liberty State Park with our sleeping angel? We hopped off at the Liberty stop with pep in our step, ready to let the good times roll.

We hadn’t gone more than 50 yards when lady luck snuck out the back. Maddie was in a state of sleep perfection when we got to the train crossing. We had just crossed the tracks when a CLANGING noise of cosmic proportions ripped through the day’s tranquility like a sonic boom. There was no place to hide, the damage was done and Maddie was not the least bit impressed.

The artificially induced shockwaves buffeted us – sending Maddie into a panicked rage and leaving us with the unenviable task of walking a mile with the angry baby.

And what a walk it was – there was no calming our little girl now. She was ready for war and our multiple lame tempts to calm her were of no consequence. We were now forced to make that “Walk of Shame” parents must endure when they have unwittingly unleashed the fury of a tired child.