From Swaddles to Bottles 

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Roll her up and lock her down!

Now that Hurricane Irene has come and gone, we are back to the business of focusing on our vivacious little vixen, Maddie. Today is actually a graduation day for Maddie’s dad, who now gets to add the title of bottle feeder to his honorary duties of burper, diaper-changer and swaddler.

Before we talk about the intricacies of bottle-feeding – we must first pay homage to the world of the SWADDLE!

More than a year before Maddie was born, I spent a great deal of time with my friends Mike and Connor and his newborn daughter, Kaleigh.

I was always amazed at the lockdown swaddle technique he employed when he wrapped Kaleigh up tight. He would vacuum seal his little girl’s squirming body like a sausage and suddenly, all would be right in Kaleigh’s little world.

As soon as Maddie was born – I always remembered my hard-knock swaddle lessons from her Uncle Mike. My wife is still amazed when the baby starts swinging for the fences and I employ the intricate Maddie Mummy Maneuver. Once the baby is strapped securely into her papoose – she gives me that look that says, “Took you long enough!”

But as I told you at the beginning of the story – today I made my first awkward attempt at bottle-feeding. I understand that this is a technique that must be truly perfected before you can become a true Stay Home PaPa.

It must be very boring to be fed by me – because Maddie kept falling asleep on the bottle. I finally got her take the whole thing – but not without a great deal of cajoling and prodding. Obviously, there will be many more chances to get my technique worked out – but it will never be as fun as the “Lockdown Swaddles.”