sleeping habits

Road to Better Sleep Runs Over Parents

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All this talk about sleep is exhausting!

Even though it’s only day one on the road to establishing proper sleep habits for the baby – it is taking a heavy toll on the parents. Maddie loves a good throw-down and a couple of wide-eyed, eager-to-help parents is just what the doctor ordered. This is in no way a stiff challenge for someone like Maddie, it’s more like an appetizer to get her warmed up.

It all started with the first nap attempt of the day. Maddie was giving PaPa all the right signs to show him that she was ready to sleep. She was relaxed and her eyes were heavy as I began to ease her into the crib.

Maddie was like a little angel straight from heaven as she settled in for what was potentially a nice long nap. About 12 seconds later, she went off like a booby trap on the side of the road. Screams, sirens and carnage now ruled the morning as Maddie lashed out against this horrible indignity. How dare you try to put me down for a nap, “Do you know who I am?”

I tried to soothe and reason with her and that only made things worse. It was now eight in the morning and Maddie already had me on the ropes – Good Times! The experts indicate that you must be persistent in pushing the naps, but they never had to go head to head with the Mad Madster.

After about 10 minutes of soothing, Maddie finally gave up, stopped crying and gave into sleep. My Lord, I’ve done it!

I strolled into the kitchen like William the Conqueror – hungry for breakfast after my epic victory. That’s when I noticed the walls of Jericho beginning to sway to and fro – the little girl was awake and was on the verge of bringing the walls down! Once again, Maddie was forced to communicate her extreme displeasure with the ineptitude of her father at the top of her lungs. Now the little girl is dug in and more determined than ever to put an end to this sleep nonsense.

By 8:20am, the signs of parental damage were everywhere. The vanquished father lifted the triumphant and sleepless baby out of the crib to show the throng of Maddie admirers the power and majesty of true defiance. Keep in mind this was only the first nap attempt of the day. Believe me when I tell you that things never got any easier. By 8pm, both parents were dead on their feet and already wondering what wonderful late-night plans Maddie had in store for both of them.

Start the Car, I Need My Sleep!

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Step on it, I got a life to lead Cha Cha!

Maddie has always been very good at sleeping in the car, but lately it’s where she’s getting her best rest. Sad but true.

The baby has been boycotting sleep like it’s her job. A half hour here and 45 minutes there, but once the car gets rolling, she goes lights out. Keep in mind I said once the car gets ROLLING.

Even the briefest of stops leaves the occupants on pins and needles, terrified that the sleeping beast may awake and lay waste to all those in her path. Today was no different – we started driving and Maddie let out a huge snort of relief. The very first traffic light I hit, Maddie lit me up like a Roman candle. The light turned green, Maddie hunkered down for another nap. Do you see a pattern here?

Once we hit the highway, all of our troubles melted away in blur of perpetual motion. Yet 40 minutes later when we arrived at our destination, tragedy struck yet again. This time, I actually had to crawl into the back seat and feed her a couple of ounces to make sure she didn’t take me out.

Luckily just two ounces did the trick and baby was actually asleep on the bottle. I crept out of the car back into the driver’s seat, never once looking in the back seat to see if the little scream therapist had spotted me. A few miles down the road, I finally dug up the courage and took a quick glimpse in the back seat, but Maddie was out.

With Maddie at the tender age of four-months-old, we are reading a great deal of material about establishing proper sleep habits. We decided that we are going to dive in this weekend and set Maddie on course to a lifetime of wonderful and blissful sleep. The real question is who will making the rules, Maddie or her parents? If you are making wagers, I would make the baby as an early 3 to 1 favorite.