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Curious Case of Maddie’s Missing Shoes

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What did you forget NOW??

As many of you already know, Maddie has an interesting habit of kicking off her shoes at the worst possible time. Let’s face it, Maddie has developed potential shoe-loss into an art form.

This morning, Maddie and I were just leaving target when she simultaneously sent both shoes flying. I caught one in the air and had to dig the other one out of basket full of coffee at Starbucks.

No harm done, I stuck the shoes under the cart and headed outside to the car.

About 15 minutes later, we made it home. I grabbed a bag and was just about to take Maddie out of her seat when I noticed her bare feet. As the Madster likes to say, “UH-OH!”

I realized that I had never retrieved the shoes from underneath the shopping buggy. Within 30 seconds, we were making our return trip to Target. I pulled up to the shopping cart area, but our cart was gone – Game on!!

I encountered an exceptionally rude woman at the customer service counter (Big Shocker) and asked her if any baby shoes had been turned in. She apparently had forgotten that I was a customer when she replied – “Nahhhh.”

I took this to mean “No” and decided to track down the shopping cart guy.

He was much friendlier than his co-worker, but wasn’t quite with the program.

I started to ask him about Maddie’s shoes, when he blurted out – “Shoes, right??” This was going to be easier than I thought – But it’s never easy in Jersey City.

He absolutely remembered the shoes, but had no idea what he had done with them. He took me back to Ms. Congeniality at the customer service desk and told her that he had turned to the shoes into her. She practically yelled at him, “Naa-Ahh, no you didinttt!!

I looked at the Shopping Cart Jedi and asked, “Think, where did you first find the shoes?”

We combed the store, he went through trashcans, looked at shelves and kept giggling to himself. Finally, I asked him if he had a little “store-item” drawer where he put random store items.

“Ohhh yea,” he exclaimed – He led us to an empty register where there was a shopping cart filled with a smattering of random items – and SUCCESS!!

Shoes On! Better luck next time Maddie!

Shopping Trip with Maddie Takes Wrong Turn

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Give me a moment to process…

Some shopping trips with the Mad Madster are better than others and some are downright painful.

Sometimes a series a events collide leading a father to abandon $60 worth of groceries in a store parking lot to deal with his mischievous one-shoed daughter.

There is one grocery store in Jersey City that we shop at for only a few items at a time. The reason for this is that the shopping carts can’t go more than ten feet out of the entrance because they are blocked in by metal barricades. This critical fact seemed to have slipped my mind as Maddie and I were checking out with far too much to carry.

It all started with a BAD checkout. The rocket scientist bagging the groceries only single-bagged a sack containing a 2-liter bottle and some other items with sharp corners. I failed to notice this because Maddie was trying to pull every item off the belt before the cashier could scan it.

I knew I was in trouble the second we got outside where there was a homeless gentleman was asking to carry my bags. I declined his kind offer and set off into the parking lot with a sense of purpose.

We made it about 20 steps when the shopping bag with the the 2-liter bottle blew apart showering the contents all over the parking lot.

COOOOL!

For some reason, this sent Maddie into a kicking frenzy. Her right foot scored a direct hit on a second bag blasting it apart with more items showering the ground along with her sneaker.

It’s a party now!

Maddie wants to get down and play in the carnage below and the car is no closer than 100 yards away.

Time to leave the groceries where they were (bye bye Maddie and I said together) as we walked away to get in the car.

Once the Mads was safely strapped in, we drove over to the mess where there was a nice man defending our pile of groceries from some curious homeless helpers.

I thanked him, hoping our adventure was over, but Maddie had more games to share with her dad.

Of course there were no parking spaces near our home, so we had to park across the busy street. We parked and the only shopping bag I grabbed to take upstairs with Maddie was her milk. We took two steps from the car when the one-shoed girl seized the bag and swung it towards her head. I had to adjust quickly, but Maddie had a death grip on the bag. I put her down to free the bag, when she whipped the sack across the sidewalk rupturing the third bag of the young morning.

At that point, there was really nothing left to do but take a few pictures.

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Am I daddy’s little helper or what? Want some raisins?

Rough Day of Teething Leads to Shopping Therapy

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Does this hat come in suede?

Maddie was up at the crack of dawn to take care of her morning schedule that was packed with stair climbing exhibitions and multiple steps around the house. She was definitely very crusty and even her morning walk could not break her out of the funk.

Surely a little breakfast would help her turn the corner. Nope, not happening. Maddie was extra-crispy with two sides of attitude and had no interest in eating. We wondered if those baby molars were ready to make a push.

We got to lunch with the grandparents with the hope that Maddie could keep herself together during the meal. That apparently was wishful thinking. Maddie started crying as soon as we sat down and wasn’t interested in being comforted by either parent. This is also when we realized that Maddie’s back teeth were knocking at her gums.

The restaurant staff and patrons seemed quite relieved when we began packing up our gear to roll. Once we were in the car, it didn’t take Maddie long to pass out. Once she was asleep, it was time for a stealth mission to Target. The only problem was that Maddie was awake as soon as we pulled up.

We popped her in a cart and she was ready to roll. She had a great deal to say to her fellow shoppers, but at least the crying had stalled. We hit the baby wagon wheel snacks first and Maddie was happy to partake.

We made the rounds and somehow, some way – the baby was at peace. The shopping trip must have been just what the doctor ordered because Maddie spent the rest of the evening laughing and playing with her parents without a care in the world. We are delighted that this put Maddie in a great mood, we just have no idea why it worked.

Let’s Pick Up the Pace Pal

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This shopping trip is a real pulse pounder!

For several months now, Maddie has been what you might call a shopping enthusiast. Each trip to the store is an adventure with plenty of people to stare at and various loose items to yank off of the shelves. So normally when we pop into a store together, it’s high times for the Madster.

Now this isn’t to say that I ever walk into a store empty-handed. I always make sure that I am armed with a formidable array of snacks and goodies in case the baby stumbles upon a rough patch. So we arrived at the store without fanfare and made our way to the baby section.

As I always do, I consulted Maddie from aisle to aisle making sure to keep her in the loop and help me with our purchasing process. However, after just a few minutes, it became apparent that my associate was quickly losing interest in our little shopping expedition.

I tried to keep her engaged, but it was a losing battle. As we turned the next aisle, Maddie started emitting a series of exaggerated sighs. As often happens, I was unable to contain my growing amusement with the baby’s antics. She quickly recognized this and decided that it was time for a standoff. Maddie interlaced her fingers behind her head and leaned back to share her state of overwhelming boredom with me.

I realized this was my cue to pick up the pace and get us checked out. Maddie resumed her theatrics and I made sure she didn’t have to wait too long before we were on our way. But there is no denying that this girl is a true entertainer.

Daddy’s Big Helper has All the Right Moves

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Keep it moving, I have coffee date in 20!

With all the rapid development Maddie is undergoing right now, there’s one thing that still hasn’t changed – she sure is Daddy’s big helper. It doesn’t matter what kind of store or restaurant we roll into, you have to know right up front that Maddie is Grabby! And with her added mobility and confidence, the stakes are rising every day.

Today we stood ready two storm two different retail establishments: Baby’s r Us and the Sports Authority. Maddie was juiced and ready to go. I led off our initial assault armed with a wide variety of distractions including some edible wagon wheels, a squeaking penguin and some bagel pieces. How long these would protect me was anyone’s guess.

There is no straying off course when Maddie is at the helm. You have to be on point, know what you want and get out before realizes you aren’t taking care of business. Case in point, I had instruction to find a back up for Maddie’s sleep bear named Barry.

I was waffling between a wide variety of possibilities and the baby could smell my hesitation a mile away. She started stretching wildly out of the shopping cart reaching for some unknown item in shiny plastic. When I placed her back in her spot, the protests started ratcheting up. The clock was ticking and the fabric on these replacement bears just wasn’t right. If I wanted to make it to Sports Authority, I had to check out now.

I hit the check out line and offered some bagel bits in one swift motion. In our world, bagels have amazing calming properties that no other food seems to possess. We wheeled our way to the sports store, as the bagel supply grew ever smaller. By the time we walked into our next stop, we were fresh out of bagels. (Time to step it up!)

I had to sort through several items to get the one I needed when I noticed that Maddie was doing some shopping of her own. She lifted a Gatorade towel off the shelf and into the cart with her. After a quick inspection, I saw that Grabby had actually made a good choice here. I let her hold on to her latest conquest while we executed another lightning checkout.

This will really come in handy – Nice choice

This is only the second time that Maddie has grabbed something that we ended up taking home. The question now becomes whether or not this practice is setting a bad precedent?

Baby’s Shopping Spit Up Challenge

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I once caught a fish this big!
Today had the look of one of those rare very easy shopping days with the Mad Madster. This was surprising because her incoming teeth aren’t pulling any punches. Maddie kept grinding them together with reckless abandon. But after she woke up from a nap this morning, I didn’t give her any time to focus on those aching gums.
 
I fed her a quick bottle, she burped and we were out the door. We enjoyed a quick trip across town and in no time at all we shopping like a pair of champs. Maddie looked spectacular in her shining new shopping car seat cover, although according to her mother, I encountered a few fashion faux pas pitfalls when I dressed the baby. So be it!
 
Maddie and I tore around the store in the shopping cart at about 60 mph while our fellow shoppers were diving for cover. We rounded the corned at frozen foods and caused one gentlemen to climb in with the frozen peas to avoid our armored assault shopping cart.
 
Maddie even snatched a quick latte out of a barista’s hand as we zoomed past the store’s built-in Starbucks. The baby started getting fired up as we neared the check out line so I grabbed her a nice fluffy bag of animal cookies. She beat the bag mercilessly trying to force her way inside. She was obviously determined to bite the heads off of any of the offending animal crackers.
 
The bag held off Maddie and we were back home in record time. That’s what I call a successful shopping trip. I scooped up Maddie and the shopping bags and started the long journey up 3 flights of stairs. Half way up the second set of stairs, Maddie
struck!
 
Without warning, she spit on me and someplace else that I couldn’t immediately identify. As I got to the top of the stairs, I saw that Maddie had spit up on two of the shopping bags.  
 
The spit up slowly dripped off of each bag and managed to hit about 16 of the 20 plus steps we had just climbed. I stood at the top of the steps while Maddie admired her latest handiwork. She looked up at me with the crooked grin that seemed to say, “Have fun with that, daddy!”