Isaac Newton

Baby Ignores the Laws of Gravity

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What were you saying about gravity?

Is it possible to teach my 11-month-old daughter Maddie to respect the laws of gravity? At this point, that answer would have to be a resounding NO!

I plopped Maddie onto our bed this afternoon for her first intensive don’t plunge off the side session. At some point, I thought I could help Maddie understand some of the real risks associated with a serious fall.

So it was time to let the games begin. I let go of Maddie and she started motoring for the end of the bed. Surely she wasn’t going go right off the side into the great abyss. But my little rocket scientist never hesitated – she crawled right off the dang bed.

I caught her and made a loud noise at the same time. She looked at me like an idiot – no fear, just annoyed that I halted her progress.

We repeated this process about a half a dozen times and made absolutely no progress whatsoever. I’m beginning to understand that there are some lessons I will not be able to teach my baby.

My wife assures me that once Maddie learns to walk, she’ll get a crash course in Newton’s laws of motion. To tell the truth, that’s exactly what I’m afraid of.