Hangover
What Do Babies Dream Of?
In the movie the Hangover, it was Stu who first posed the question, “What do tigers dream of, when they take a little tiger snooze?” Sadly, Stu never discovered the answer to that age-old question, but he did learn that “Tigers love pepper and hate cinnamon.”
Maddie’s first bad dream didn’t come in the middle on the night; it actually hit her during a nap in the early evening. Gina was talking on the phone and had the sleeping baby on her lap when all the sudden Maddie jerked awake in terror.
One look at her face and you could tell she not a happy camper. She started howling immediately and was completely out of sorts. I scooped her up and pulled her close to my chest while gently talking to her. Maddie scanned the surrounding area and gave me a look that said, “How did you manage to let that happen?”
We went downstairs where I sank into the couch and kept holding the baby tightly. I dried her tears and she literally fell right back asleep as if nothing had ever happened. Her total time awake probably equaled less than 90 seconds.
This begs the question, what do babies dream about and what could be that frightening? Experts say that the brain development from 3 to 6 month olds is off the charts, but of course they have no way of knowing what the baby might be dreaming about.
What was equally interesting was Maddie’s rapid recovery time. No sooner had she been assured that there was nothing to be afraid of or worried about when she picked up right where she left off.
Maddie has been sleeping more and more at night, but this incident DID NOT seem to throw her off at all – though it was quite alarming for her parents. It’s also interesting to note many of the things that trouble us as parents, don’t seem to worry Maddie one bit. It seems that our little munchkin is on that never-ending quest to keep her parents engaged and guessing at all times.
Stu Price: So, uh, are you sure you’re qualified to be taking care of that baby?
Alan Garner: What are you talking about? I’ve found a baby before.
Stu Price: You found a baby before? Where?
Alan Garner: Coffee Bean.
Baby Exploits Fear During Feeding Time
Lions are opportunist hunters and will devour the closest animal regardless of its age, sex or condition. Lions never test potential prey for weaknesses – they just move in and to quote Ricky Bobby’s Daddy from the movie Talladega Nights: “That beautiful death machine will do what God made it to do, namely, eat you with a smile on it’s face.”
Dealing with Maddie during feeding time is now very similar to driving with an angry jungle cat in the passenger seat next to you. As my little girl continues to grow, her temperament during mealtime becomes downright terrifying. To celebrate seven weeks of close brushes with death during feeding time – I’ve compiled a short list of movies where human beings have found themselves face to face with wild animals not normally found in the confines of a car.
#1 – Tommy Boy
David Spade and Tommy Boy have to flee the car because an angry deer has woken up in the back seat and mauled the interior. Once the deer has finished with the car, it trots off into the woods prompting Tommy Boy to say, “I swear I’ve seen a lot of stuff in my life, but that… was… *awesome*.”
#2 – Talladega Nights
Ricky Bobby’s Daddy traps a cougar and slips it into the car so Ricky Bobby can learn how to drive with the fear. When Ricky gets home to his Mom, she asks him how the meeting with his father went to which he replies, “”Well, I was mauled by a cougar, learned nothing about driving and my Crystal Gayle shirt was ruined. But other than that, it went fine.”
#3 – Hangover
Stu, Phil and Alan are driving Mike Tyson’s tiger back to the champ’s house when the cat wakes up and attacks the boys and maims the Mercedes. This is just moments after Alan was reviewing some of the eating habits of tigers by explaining that: “Tigers Love Pepper. They Hate Cinnamon!”
#4 – Groundhog Day
Bill Murray gets bitten not once, but twice by an angry groundhog. It happens during the scene where Murray kidnaps Punxsutawney Phil and takes off with him in the pickup truck. These bites were not supposed to happen and were never actually shown during the movie. During the scene where Bill gets bitten, he lets the groundhog drive and tells him, “Don’t drive angry! Don’t Drive Angry!”
Now We’re Getting Somewhere
My wife Gina and I were told to report the hospital around 7pm for the arrival of our first child.
“Go home and relax,” they said. Oh sure, of course, just chill out, take a nap, get paid.
The fact of the matter is that two type “A” personalities can only take it sooo easy before the wheels come off.
After five years of enticement, I did finally get my wife to listen to and actually enjoy the Doors. (focus on the small victories)
Now that she has drifted off to sleep, I’ve already switched my music to the Red Hot Chili Peppers. I’m left with their voices and my thoughts to help quell any inner anxieties.
In case your wondering, I’m a stay at home Dad. Welll, not yet, but soon enough.
I’ve heard multiple opinions on this matter.
“Jesus, get him some help.” “Men can’t manage a baby by themselves.” “Did Oswald act alone?”
I’ve decided that indeed I can raise this child – like a champ in case you are wondering. It just might take a little trial and error.
Popular opinion says everything is about to change. But don’t things always change? How crazy can this process really be?
That question will probably take many years to answer – but please use this as a guide or narrative as to where this unfolding adventure might lead us.
Stay Home PaPa 