Now that Hurricane Irene has come and gone, we are back to the business of focusing on our vivacious little vixen, Maddie. Today is actually a graduation day for Maddie’s dad, who now gets to add the title of bottle feeder to his honorary duties of burper, diaper-changer and swaddler.
Before we talk about the intricacies of bottle-feeding – we must first pay homage to the world of the SWADDLE!
More than a year before Maddie was born, I spent a great deal of time with my friends Mike and Connor and his newborn daughter, Kaleigh.
I was always amazed at the lockdown swaddle technique he employed when he wrapped Kaleigh up tight. He would vacuum seal his little girl’s squirming body like a sausage and suddenly, all would be right in Kaleigh’s little world.
As soon as Maddie was born – I always remembered my hard-knock swaddle lessons from her Uncle Mike. My wife is still amazed when the baby starts swinging for the fences and I employ the intricate Maddie Mummy Maneuver. Once the baby is strapped securely into her papoose – she gives me that look that says, “Took you long enough!”
But as I told you at the beginning of the story – today I made my first awkward attempt at bottle-feeding. I understand that this is a technique that must be truly perfected before you can become a true Stay Home PaPa.
It must be very boring to be fed by me – because Maddie kept falling asleep on the bottle. I finally got her take the whole thing – but not without a great deal of cajoling and prodding. Obviously, there will be many more chances to get my technique worked out – but it will never be as fun as the “Lockdown Swaddles.”